Monday, December 13, 2010

Im so mad!!

A few weeks ago when my daughter ran away I was searching every place for her. All our neighborhood friends denied seeing her and promised to call if they did. I trusted that. Imagine my shock when I find out that she has been staying two doors down with a lady that promised she would call me if she saw me. When I look back, I remember speaking to this lady almost every day about my daughter. I remember telling her how much I missed her and just wanted her to come home.

People are so different these days. I remember when I was a little girl riding my bike through the streets of small town Grand Junction, Colorado. All the neighborhood kids were out playing in the creak...all the parents were on the look out for us...and the parents spoke to each other. I remember my mom finding out things that I did that she could not have possibly found out without the help of a neighbor friend. Our parents were networking...sharing information....watching out for us.

Its not like that now. I have had some very good girlfriends disown me for (what I could figure at the time) no apparent reason. Later I would find out that they caught my daughter doing something inappropriate and they assumed I was letting her do it so they decided that they didn't want to be my friend anymore. They didn't stop and talk to me...they didn't GRAB my daughter by the EAR and drag her home and tell me what she had been up to.....no....they just walk by her...give her a dirty look and not tell me. I'M THE PARENT! Why would someone think I would let my kids do those things?

The point is, the parents these days are not networking anymore. You better believe that if I see your kid out smoking or making out or doing inappropriate things...I'M GOING TO TELL YOU! Are we so busy in life now that we cant be concerned for anybody outside our little homes? Don't people know that what other peoples kids do affects our kids as well? It matters...it all matters!

Through a series of events I found out that one of the boys in my daughters school was dealing drugs. I didn't know this boys name, only his code name "Elmo." I started asking around so I could find out who "Elmo" was. I eventually did get his name...sat my happy butt on the computer and pulled up Facebook. Oh how I love facebook. Its the parents guide to who's who. I looked up this kids name and lo and behold he had listed his mom on his facebook. I pulled up everyone in my little town that had her name and started calling everyone of them (at midnight) to see who had a boy by this name. I did find her....and I did tell her. I felt it couldn't wait until morning....it directly affected my children....and it was imperative that she knew RIGHT away. She didn't say much to me. I could hear sorrow and worry in her voice. She said thank you, and I never heard from her again. At that point is was not my problem anymore.

This boy "Elmo" is a bright young man. He playes two instruments, and enjoys some sports. He has a bright bright future, but not while he is on drugs. He isn't my kid, but I care about him.

I'm so so sad how things have turned out the past few years. This is a dog eat dog world for sure. I remember when the kids were little I would say to myself "It will be so nice when they can wipe their own butts." If I knew then what I know now I wouldn't not have thought that. I would gladly go back to that stage if I could protect my kids a little longer from this harsh world. I grew up in the Christian school. I don't feel like I have the skills to defend all the mess the public schools dish out. I feel powerless, alone, sometimes hopeless. I lean on God to get me through. He is my strength, my strong tower.

My advice: Watch out for each other. If you see someone else's kid fall (drugs, sex, smoking, whatever it is), pick them up, drag them home, and TATTLE on them. I know not every parent cares. I see lots of kids just roaming the streets and neighborhoods without supervision...with a cigarette in hand. I know that we cant hold our kids hands forever, and I know things are beyond crazy right now with our youth, but don't pass them by...if you know them, help them, if you don't know them and its in your power to do something, do it!

I wish someone would have helped me! Hold me Jesus! Father hold our children in your arms...dont let go...dont let go!

9 comments:

Rebekah said...

I definitely agree with the "it takes a village" theory. Kids have many influences in their lives, it's so important to surround them with love and stability. I'm sorry you're going through the ringer...don't ever stop praying for your babies.

jodilee0123 said...

I wish you lived on my block. Don't let others make you feel bad for caring. EVER! Keep it up. Sending my prayers and cyber support!

Two Hands said...

I'm with you. While I know that parents don't care now like they used to, I'd still say something.
People like you give me hope for humankind...

Melrose said...

Rebekah, everything you said is 100% right, it is the true Christian model of how we are to live our lives. I have a feeling there will be commenters who will say otherwise, but I can give you a million scripture passages that will prove them wrong. I feel sad that you do not have neighbors/friends that are living up to what is any parents responsibility but you have the one who sees and knows all, your Lord, on your side. I wish I had YOU as a neighbor!!! What a dear friend you must be! I will be praying for you.

All My Monkeys said...

You come be MY neighbor. I'm with ya, sista. We need to support each other, instead of work against each other. Parenting is hard work. WHy would we not? THat whole "it's none of my business" thing is a load of crap. I'm all for tattling.

webkinzfan said...

Oh Sweetie- I'm so sorry you're having a tough time. I wish we could be neighbors too- or at least church friends. I believe that most parents who truely want the best for their kids want to know if they are doing things that will cause harm to themselves or others. I'm praying for you and your kids. HUGS from Tracy!

Natalie said...

Are you ok? Hoping you had a wonderful Christmas.

Katydid said...

I hope you are doing ok.. Praying for you.

Katy

Melrose said...

update update! Miss your posts :)