Tuesday, June 29, 2010

Stains!

Before I got pregnant with Tyrus I had a daycare that I ran out of my home. It worked perfectly for me. I was able to be home with the kids every day and still bring in some money. Ive worked odd jobs all my life, mostly things that dealt with customer service. I even worked for Discover Card at one point. The majority of my life has been at home, raising my kids, and babysitting other peoples kids. I loved it. I invested my life in other peoples lives. It was wonderful. Who could ask for more?

When I got pregnant with Tyrus I lost a lot because of my choices. I lost both of my babysitting jobs (I had two). One left because of personal changes in her life (love you S) and the other left out of hate towards me. I was left pregnant, no boyfriend, no job, and four little mouths to feed. It was a scary place to be. I was living off child support and food stamps.

I wanted out. I believe there is a time and a place to be on government assistance, but one must not make a career out of it. I wanted to be self sufficient so I made a choice to jump back into the work force again. I had babysat or cleaned houses for years and I wanted to prove to myself that I could do more. I could do better for me and my kids. So after Tyrus was born.....I got a job...a wonderful job in an orthodontics's office. I was the receptionist. It quickly became my favorite job EVER!!

Soon after my job started, I started noticing some "not so good" things. It was a family owned practice with the only employees being me and the assistant. The doctors wife was the office manager and essentially the one who I would always go to. Everything went through her.

A few weeks into my job I received my first review. I was informed that the Doctor didn't trust me because I was a "single mom with four kids who would probably be looking for a man to support her and consequently get married, run off and leave us high and dry." I was blown away by this comment but being my normal passive self just pushed it off. After about the third time of being told I was on probation and repeatedly being told the Doctor didn't trust me I had to say something. I told my boss who I will call "O" that the assistant was a single mom to and that she had just as much of a chance to run off and marry a man as I did. To that "O" replied "but she has a degree and does this for a living."

These comments were thrown around constantly during my seven months of employment. I was repeatedly told that I was not doing a good job and I basically spent the entire seven months of my job on probation. I believe that the doctor would do things to me to be vindictive...simple things like asking me to bring my own tissues "because I use to many and I was causing the office to much money in tissues", or locking me out of the office if I used the back door to use the restroom(we didnt have a bathroom we could use in the office). Yes I could go through the front but I preferred to use the back door so that the entire waiting room didn't know that I just went to the restroom. Any time I would get ice out of the ice maker he would empty it as if to avoid my germs. These things seem silly I'm sure....but they really degraded me.

In all honesty, I did make mistakes. This job requires a lot of accuracy and I did the best I could but would fall short sometimes. I believe this was my only shortcoming though. I worked every day I could, was never late and in eight months never missed a single day of work. I was very proud of that accomplishment. It wasn't easy. I have four children and to juggle all their little lives and my job was sometimes very challenging.

Most recently (within the past month) my hours were cut drastically. The new rule was if there was only four patients in the morning then they would ask me not to come in. One day while sitting in the lunch room I read on the office wall that I could apply for partial unemployment if my hours were reduced. I thought it was a good way to make supplemental income since my paychecks had been so slim with the cut in hours. In my head it was a great solution. Apparently it was not. "O" received my unemployment papers in the mail and directly called my coworker (the only other non family employee in the office) and asked if she knew anything about me filing unemployment. Fortunately the assistant and I are friends so she promptly called me. I felt violated. My boss was calling people and sharing my personal information. I confronted my boss the next day...(which was actually yesterday) and her response was "I had to find out what was going on."

Today, on a beautiful sunny day and what seemed to be a good "working" day....

I was fired.

Back to the drawing board. If you pray....pray for me! In all honesty, I feel like a dirty old shirt with a bunch of stains on it. I know I'm worth more, I just don't feel it right now.

27 comments:

H said...

Oh Rebekah, I'm so sorry!!! This does not sound right...not even remotely right. Something else is going on with this guy. As scary as it is to you to lose this job, I have a feeling that it will be a blessing in disguise! Praying for the best job for you...pronto!!!

Faith said...

OMG, how did you survive 8 months of that?! That is SERIOUS abuse! I am a program manager and could not even imagine treating an employee like that! I am angry for you!! I would have cried every day if I was being treated like that! You do NOT deserve that, and they do not deserve you. Wow, I'm all riled up! You are not the one with stains, they are. Seriously. I'm just disgusted.

You can be sure you will be in my thoughts. I will hope for you an amazing job with people who treat you like the amazing woman and professional that you are. Hang in there.

Celeste said...

I hope that you save all those reviews & documented all the comments that were made, because you could file a serious complaint at your local EEOC office.
http://www.eeoc.gov/laws/practices/index.cfm

jodilee0123 said...

I don't even know how to respond to that. Rise above them. It is awful that this happened to you. It sounds like a creepy place to work and in the future you will probably see the office in the news for something gone wrong. (I used to work at a creepy chiropractor's office.) I pray that the most awesomest job ever comes your way!!!

Corinne said...

Sounds like you're better off out of there!
I'm sure you'll find something much better soon though, you loved babysitting, could you try and work in a daycare or kindergarten? Or start from home again??
Good luck!

mak'n Changes said...

Wow!! I'm speechless! Wow!

Nati @ I will praise Him said...

Seriously? That is awful! I know you probably don't see it like that right now, but you should be glad you're out of there.

What a terrible employer you had!!!

Maybe you could start a daycare again from home?

Rebekah said...

I'm sorry, friend...Let's talk tonight.

Wendy said...

I'm very sorry, Rebekah. It doesn't sound like the situation was fair at all. Hope you find something else soon.

Deanna said...

Contact an employment lawyer - seriously.

And I'll be praying for you! But I think some serious laws were broken. And at least now you have that experience in an office to put on your resume'!

Rachel said...

Oh, Rebekah...I am so sorry. Can you collect full unemployment now, though? I will pray....

Sissy said...

Wow. Don't you hate it that bosses aren't sometimes very considerate to their employees? My current principal makes very strange and questionable choices sometimes and I end up feeling like dirt, and I DO have a degree to do this. No matter what kind of job you have, if your boss is sucky you can end up feeling horribly.

I know you will find something much better soon!

Annjeri said...

I love you bunches sis. I am so sorry that this happened.

MtnGirl said...

I sent you an email, but this job doesn't sound like a good fit for you and it just might be a blessing in disguise! :-)

Renia Flaishans said...

HOW TERRIBLE!! I cant believe this. I am speechless!
Renea (Michigan)

Anonymous said...

I'm so sorry that is so unfair... you do not deserve to be treated in such a way. I will be thinking of you and hoping something much better comes along, perhaps this will be the beginning of a wonderful change :)

Anonymous said...

I can almost picture this environment! Ickkkkk!!! Well, it served a purpose for a time...sure sorry you had to endure all of that but take what you have learned and use it for good. You are an expert at that Rebekah, and don't ever forget it. What a precious woman you are. You have no idea all of the women you have inspired along the way. Keep at it. God's plans for you are good.

Anonymous said...

Remember everything happens for a reason. I remember some of your past blog entries where I could feel that you weren't comfortable at your job. You weren't treated with respect & courtesy.

When one door closes, another opens.

I will pray for you, like I always do!

You are a smart, strong, hardworking, ethical, honest, kind, sincere, respectful woman, Rebekah! I could go on & on. You will prevail.

In the mean time, FULL UNEMPLOYMENT compensation. And don't let them bully you when they dispute it!

And, while you're off, we should do lunch (I'll treat)!! I don't mind driving to the Springs and I would love, love, love to meet you & your son!

Email me, BJBS97@msn.com

Much love,
JC

Jaclyn said...

Wow. I am so sorry you were treated with such disregard. No one deserves that. I have no advice to give, but keep trusting that God has a plan!

mak'n Changes said...

I love how many people love you... its so easy to do you know....

cin

Annalisa@Gracie'sGarden said...

YAY! Reading this whole post (and much of your blog just now) the biggest and greatest climax was reading "I was fired." GREAT NEWS! That means God has better and greener fields for you my sister in Christ. Believe it. My prayers are with you. But I think you are in for a big surprise when you find out what's ahead. I am so happy for you.

I'd also like to share, I adopted a baby out too. I had two children, single mum, and the third was given up. It was an "easy" decision, because 1. I was adopted as a baby myself and 2. The sperm donor had been sent to prison. I knew three kids was way more than I could handle. A few years later (4 years ago) when I found out I was pregnant for the fourth time, I told my boyfriend, the love of my life "I've done it before, and I'll consider it again. If you'll help me raise these three children, I would love to. But I cannot and will not do it alone." He committed his life to us and shortly after I committed my life to God. I have seen blessing after blessing ever since. It's not been easy - I had a 3 1/2 year court battle with my first husband that was STRESSFUL and hard, but it was my faith in Christ that got me through it with a smile. I know you'll be fine. Take it as an exciting season in your life. It is exciting, if that is how you'll see it. GOD BLESS YOU WITH ALL THE FAVOUR HE CAN AFFORD YOU!!!! <3

Mommy2Four said...

I'm so sorry about what you had to go through, but I truly believe God never closes a door without opening a window. Sometimes, that window appears where you didn't even know a window could! I know that sometimes God's path, and our desires, do not coincide... but I KNOW that God's plan is infinitely better than anything I could ever have hoped for..... I just have to do my part, and keep trying to do the next right thing.

Praying for you!

Melrose said...

Perhaps God gave you this job to show you you CAN do whatever you desire. Aim high, my prayers are with you.

~Katie said...

What a JERK! I am so glad you are outa there! I wish somehow the patients and parents of all the patients he sees could get wind of this... That is just awful and I wouldn't let that Ahole touch my or anyone I loved mouths. Ugh. Something GREAT is bound to be around the corner.

Heather said...

As mentioned in another comment, I hope that you kept a record of these reviews because I do not think that what your employer did was correct. When you were hired did you sign something saying how long probation was because 8 months seems like a long time. Everyone makes mistakes but that does not give him the right to treat you like that. I hope that you get a great job where you are treated like you should be. Take care

Jo said...

I cant believe you put up with them as long as you did. You deserve so much better. I would report them to the Better Business Bureau if i were you.

Kel said...

R,I ztyhmn tddhghgjjggghfhggbhbnmnjbhghf jack had to say hi.

I know I'm late in reading this, but I want you to know I'm praying for you. Family practices are one thing, but run by family is usually a problem. Especially when the wife is the office manager. I've seen it before, and it's awful. I hope this Admin job works out well for you!