Feeling so good!!

I think that today is honestly the first day in the past nineteen weeks that I have actually felt good. I have so much energy, I feel like I am back to my old self. That's how I usually am, busy all the time even if I am home. I like TV but I cant stand sitting in front of it all the time. I can hardly (usually) sit for an hour without getting up at least five times. I am just a busy body. So for me, the past nineteen weeks has been very very depressing.

Well its Friday, so tonight the kids stay up for movies. I don't particularly like stay up nights because I usually have one or two kids that don't mind the rules of quiet time and I usually woken up around midnight and I have to get the mean mommy pants out and put them to bed. You would think they would learn. Victoria is usually making ten cups of hot tea (she is addicted), which means to much sugar for her, Matthew is usually flipping over the couch or looking for more and more snacks. My kids are not allowed to just get food out of the fridge. They have to ask for snacks, and I do that because otherwise I would have really really overweight kids and no food in the kitchen. I have learned my lesson.

As far as the adoption goes. Me and R and B are still communicating through email. I am really enjoying it. We find more and more in common every day. I did send in all the paperwork required. I don't know what the next step is. I know R and B have an appointment with the worker next week so after that we will see. And of course, the very anticipated 20 week ultrasound. I am so excited. My kids found out about it by hearing me on the phone and a few want to go. I am not sure about this. Ill talk about this in the next paragraph.

I tend to not focus attention or talk about the baby very much. I don't know if this is right or not. I know I cant hide it from them because they already know, but I guess I am trying to protect them from more emotional pain. In my mind I think that if they are not to attached then it wont hurt them so much. This is probably backwards and wrong but that is just what I am doing. Ill need to talk to the girls counselor about that and see if I should change my thinking. Does any of that reasoning make sense? Of course Ive never done this before so its all new to me.

Anyway, man vs wild is on tonight so I am excited. I believe it is a new episode. I think I will get these six loads of laundry folded before it comes on. (sigh)

Oh, here is a picture of Chelsea before school yesterday. OK here is the scoop with her. She is only twelve years old, but her body looks like a sixteen year old. She wants to grow up so fast. Its frustrating. Anyway, I had to take makeup away from her because she was putting it on to heavy and I just didn't think it was appropriate for a twelve year old. So for Christmas she got some "bare minerals" from Grandma. For those who don't know, it is a powder foundation. Anyway, its to dark. My daughter is generally a very white girl like her mom, but with the foundation on, she is tan. Oh my, and I don't have the heart to tell her its to dark. Also, she has MAJOR curly hair but when she was with Grandma (in another state mind you) she had it permanently straightened. So some days it looks OK and then there are days like in the picture. I love my daughter, but she is really in an awkward stage.