Saturday, July 11, 2009

The blind women sees!!!!!

I had to post. Ive had a lot on my mind lately. Ive been doing a lot of reflecting...but I am careful not to do to much of it at one time because it takes me down a dark path of thinking "what if." For example what If I didn't marry my first husband? And what if I didn't marry my second husband? What if I didn't get pregnant with Ty? Sure my life would be easier. Maybe I would have taken life slower, made more informed decisions....but the truth is that I am really a "fly by the seat of my pants" kind of girl. I have no idea why. But what if those things had not happened? The only explanation is that I wouldn't have my wonderful kids and Ben and Rebekah wouldn't have Ty. You cant go back, you can only move forward and thank God for what you have. I keep telling myself those things and I am usually only in the "self pity" mode for a short time....and I am able to move on.

Rebekah called me today...twice. I wasn't home so I didn't know she called but when I did get home...and I saw that she had called, my heart did flip flops. It would be the first time I talked to her since they left. I also received Ty's birth announcement in the mail. I am so special to be able to get these wonderful trinkets of his life. Ill cherish it forever. Oh and I hear he is nine pounds now....he is growing fast and he has taken on a feisty personality.....hummmm....sounds like four other children I know. LOL

I ordered some new glasses the day Rebekah and Ben left for home. I was so glad to have a doctors appointment that day because it was such a much needed distraction for my broken heart. My prescription was so bad that I was getting headaches and just really struggling to see street signs and such. Well today I got the call that the glasses were in. After having a wonderful afternoon with my mom and sister I scooted down there and picked them up. The minute I put them on I felt a bit dizzy. I have been seeing a world of blur for a few years now. I cant BELIEVE what I was missing out on. Everything is so crisp and clean looking. I feel like I am six again and I am putting on my glasses for the first time. It does wonders for my sore eyes. These eyes have seen a lot in my life time...more then I would care to tell. Lately they have seen a lot of tears...but today....I see clarity in more ways then one.

Potty training has just about left me hopeless. I was thinking that it wouldn't take long to do this. After a whole week of...well you saw the video two blogs back...I am exhausted by it. I really do want to give up and just slap a diaper on my son. Someone suggested I just give it up for now and wait...but the problem is...he is not fitting very well in size six diapers...and Ill tell you... that's the biggest size they sell. I do not have a small child. So, thanks to you all's encouragement...I press on. (sigh)

These are HORRIBLE pictures...but I don't have anyone around to take photos of me, well Skyler would gladly volunteer that job but I don't think so, so this is all I could do. Its been so hot here so my hair is all tied back and I'm just so tired after a long day. is me in all my beauty. LOL

The glasses above actually have a really pretty green around the edges but the picture doesn't show that. And can you believe I am even waring these silly things? Don't they remind you of the glasses we wore in the eighty's and nineties. I cant believe they are in style. The picture below is actually transition (whooooohhhh) lenses and are supposed to turn to sun glasses in the sun. I have yet to see that happen but if and when it does I will be in total amazement...its like magic to me. LOL I have not worn a pair of sunglasses in years. I feel spoiled.


Amber, That's Me! said...

LOVE the top ones, they are my favorite. I am in need or a serious change with my prescription also. It has been 3 1/2 years for me. I also have not worn sunglasses forever- how funny!

You look great!

mak'n Changes said...

First of all, your face has thinned ot a lot! How much weight have you lost? Second. I love those glasses! You look great and gosh it must be nice to see again.
Sorry things are slow go with mr. Potty Boy. I guess this is another thing I will be seeking your wisdom for in the future.
Love you!

Sara said...

Love Love Love the new glasses! The top ones are the bomb diggity ... hmmmm cant let my dd hear me say that i am sure she would roll her eyes and make a snickity remark about me thinking i am cool :) ... At anyrate ... I like the way you SEE things - you can only move forward and Rebekah let me tell you there is a beautiful path God is preparing for you to walk down, One filled with the grace that only God himself can bring! I am EXCITED to see where God is going to lead you how he is going to bless you and your beautiful kiddos, I wait anticipating all that HE has for YOU! You have allowed yourself to be put into a position of use for the Lord a position in which you have been humbled and allowed Him to bless Rebekah and Ben through you and i tell you what there is NO BETTER place to be girl!!!! I am living proof!!!! praying beautiful blessings for you and yours! SB

Midwest Mom said...

Rebekah, I love the glasses and am so happy that you treated yourself to new ones that actually WORK- what a great concept, huh? Believe you me, I know how that Mom's we are always last on our own lists!

You look super!! I am so glad you are feeling better! You look like you feel so much better too!

Big hugs!

Anonymous said...

Stick to the potty training my daughter is not old enough yet. However, I have learned the key to potty training is consistency. My sil was never consistent with my niece and it took her forever to be potty trained!!!

You have made mistakes in the past we all have. However, you are now saved. Take the time and in the future pray before any major decision. It can make a difference.

Julie said...

I have four kids and potty training what THE one thing I hated most abot raising kids. Out of the four, I only had one kid that was easy.

I just wanted to also let you know that I admire you so much. We adopted three of my four kids. I can tell you from an adoptive Mom's persprective that I love each of my kids so much. They are so cherished and have a good life. My older two kids have an open adoption with their birth family and we have included them as a part of our extended family. Our third child's adoption is close by the birth mother's choice.

Anyway, I really admire your courage.

~Katie said...

You look awesome! Love the new glasses!

cc said...

Oh My have lost so much weight. It really shows in your face.
I absolutely LOVE your new glasses they are so precious on you.
Isn't it great to see so clearly? I go to the eye dr. this week and I'm so glad. I can tell that I need a new prescription also. It's been a couple of years since I had an exam.

Hang in there with the potty training, it'll just 'click' one day with Skyler and all this frustration will be only a memory.


Rebekah said...

Love the glasses!! You look so Mod in the top pair!! Ben just got prescription sunglasses two summers ago and it's revolutionized his summers! :)

Glad you're doing well!

Anonymous said...

Cant comment on twitter but about Skyler being hyperactive...sometimes people say things without giving it a lot of thought. Who is she to ask such a question?

Rebecca said...

I don't have twitter, so I can't respond there, but it sure looks like from your photos that you are quickly shedding the pounds! Walking will not only help that process, but it will probably give you more energy in the long run to be getting your body active! So keep up the good work!

Chelle said...

Your glasses look gerat. I can't believe how much weight you have already lost. You look fantastic!